The Bridge will be there...

Distance is defined as "the property created by the space between two object or people." (thanks Websters.)

What it doesn't speak of is emotional distance, the understanding is more of a physical distance.

While phyiscal distances are sometimes hard to overcome, emotional distances can cause more damage.

We can always pick up the phone or get on an airplane to dispatch with any physical distance, but how many ways are there to bridge an emotional one?

Is there a limit to an emotional distance? How far can you possibly run? If you live a block away from the other person - is the separation any greater if you live thousands of miles away?
Does one hurt more than the other?

On some level we are all willing to open our eyes to acknowledge physical distance as a reason for not being or doing what we should or say we want to. I also think we can also find it easier to pick up the phone and deal with the tough stuff if we do not see people face to face. Same goes for email, typing, letters etc.,

Yet I believe there is an unwillingness of each of us to see emotional distances the same way. Perhaps it is because we feel we have been hurt, maligned or misunderstood. Perhaps we are waiting for the other person to make amends for their "wrongdoings". Perhaps we don't know how to get back across that ever widening gap.

It might be a possibility that the other person in this drama feels the same way and they are waiting for us to make the first move, to apologize, to accept responsibility. So then what, a stalemate that gets worse over time until it is too late and live with regrets we can never forget?

It's always hard to be the first person to reach out for fear of reprisal or rejection, that is an honest and reasonable way to think. It means we care and if we didn't care, there wouldn't have been the need for the distance in the first place.

Is there a "safe" way to reach out without feeling too vulnerable to act? Is there a way to take the deal breakers out of the situation? Is there a gesture you can make to let the other person know you care?

Have you thought about the situation from the other persons perspective? Have you allowed yourself to accept responsiblity for your part in the situation? Have you realized that no matter what happened, it is not as important as living your life without that person in it? Do you know what you want the other person to do to "make it up" or to reach out to you? If you do, then you should do exactly that for them.

It's not about being right or wrong, holding grudges, judging or passing sentence. It's about being human, acknowledging we are on different paths and that sometimes we will intersect at moments that may not be beneficial to both parties. Most misunderstandings come from lack of communication or understandings - not from people being malicious or plain mean.

Centre yourself in a place of love, understanding and acceptance then take that first step to help hold up, to encourage and support the other person - even when it is hardest. You might surprise yourself to realize that you are being held right back and that they have been there all along.

Taking a chance to bridge the distance can be scary, it can hurt and it can be painful. However, not doing it and not taking that chance can result in losing the chance to ever share love and joy with that person. Is the situation worth losing any more time with that loved one?

Life is too short to not work your way back to those you love. As we have all heard - take the first step and the bridge will be there...